Owning Wednesday – Annabel Joseph

Owning Wednesday

When you make love, do you look in the mirror? –Hell yeah!

Who do you think of, does he look like me? – Nah-uh! Umm…. Tommy Page, you Rick Price asrcasm !

Do you tell lies and say that it’s forever? – Yeah, bet your skinny Def Leppard ass!

Do you think twice, or just touch ‘n’ see? – just touch and scream babe!

Many moons ago , one of the crummy exes had been mouthing moronic elucidations of ‘Love Bites’ and here I was curled up wondering why not just sing an Amy Grant and shut the fuck up! I love Def’s song, not this motherfucking crap crooning like a bastard child of Baltimora swaggering like a bare-ass Tarzan in my bed. Why the hell I’m writing this in a review , I have no damn idea. But , as far as my sexual memory takes me, I reckon this lunacy happened on a Wednesday. I had cut school, a convent is not a freaking 90210, no matter how many chapels you visit asking for salvation. So, here I was desiring a Madonna-esque Enigma carousing abiding certain Principles of Lust. And, all I got was a Pet Shop Boy free falling a Tom Petty. Wednesday is my favourite day of the week and I have this bizarre affinity to the word. But, this had nothing to do with my pick of this book. It’s like waiting for a berry blow pop surprise you – it’s a sucker ….. No! It’s a fucking gum! It’s BDSM……No! It’s a romantic erotica! John Secada or Guns N’ Roses…….hmm… Toad the Wet Sprocket it is!

Hurt me. Own me. Take me. Want me. Be my master. Be my slave.

I tried, I brought out my best satin sheets along with my patience. Stop the music. Maybe a Ed Sheeran. How about Lana del Rey. No freaking rhythmic composition then. I obediently read anticipating impressive imagery. You, Vincent, owned Wednesday cracking her virginal coyness with your rugged yet caring touch. Daniel, what the fuck? But, all the recurring heaving Wednesdays gave me was a blessed memory of a bozo in my bed and the cringe fest to “Was it straight? Was it perfect?” on the following Thursday.

Remember me? You sucked me off once, it was great. Then I fucked you, two times actually. And I spanked you over my lap, just to make your lover mad.

Only if all beautiful Wednesdays recollections could stay true to these sentiments laced with a large ass cigar and erase the squirming moments screaming…. Fuck yeah….. Hess is More!



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